chapter 7 - silk over thorns

Today we visited a silk factory, hearing a rumble and following it to a cavernous room where silk thread wound down from foot long spindles onto the warp and weft sides of looms. Middle aged ladies nimbly moved these back and forth as the looms juddered and clattered, with results both tawdry and magnificent. A heap of thread ends lay on the floor where they positively glowed. I’d have loved to buy a length of fabric but everything is made for the overseas market, the cost being prohibitive for locals. Now that’s sad.

Afterwards we tried Dragon Well Tea, for which Hangzhou is also known, and explored ‘Xi Hu’. Every Chinese city has a ‘West Lake’, but this one is perhaps the most famous. As we passed a little gazebo, our attention was caught by an old man making wicker brushes and little hand brooms. Such speed over intricate work must tax elderly eyes and hands, but each little broom was perfect, a piece of art. Hamish started the bargaining dance.

“Are you buying that for your place or mine?,” I asked him as he emerged nearly as triumphant as the seller and he handed me his lovely prize. I immediately regretted breaking our self-imposed taboo.

“I was kind of thinking it might be for our place.”

“We don’t have a place. You are going to Germany and I am staying in London.” I couldn’t stop myself, the words came out.

“But when we are done, we’ll get a place. Wherever we want. Wherever we choose.”

“Unless something changes.”

“Well of course. Change is good. That’s what you taught me. Choose our own destiny. Do whatever we want.”

“Glad I’ve added something positive to your life.”

“What’s wrong? You seem out of sorts. If you don’t like the broom I can give it to my granny.”

“It’s not about the broom. I love the broom. I just don’t know why you are talking about our place when for two years, maybe three, we’re going to be apart.”

“But only physically. There will be visits. And I promise I will phone you at least every week if not oftener.”

“But you won’t be there.”

“No, but I’ll imagine I am. Come on, buck up. You know how much I hate my job, and how little scope it has. This degree will mean I can build towards a future. Where we can be together.”

“I don’t know. It sounds like you are pretty happy to go your own way without me.”

“Oh now, I don’t feel that way at all. Are you still mad because I didn’t talk it over with you first? Ok I’m sorry about that. I know that I sometimes I make snap decisions. I'm not used to having anyone else around who is part of my decisions. I promise I will try to do better at communicating.”

“How about trying communicating period? And don't say 'it's a guy thing'. Andrew never seemed to have any trouble doing it.”

There was beat of silence. I bit my lower lip. How did that come out?

“Well, I can’t compete with Mr. Perfect now can I? All I can do is learn from the master.”

Hamish smiled a smile that was not quite a smile and I regretted my remark. I gave him a hug, which was probably a little halfhearted. He stiffened and I backed off.